by Janelle Moncada

Every year, about 1.5 million Americans are diagnosed with traumatic brain injury (TBI). TBI, also referred to as the “silent epidemic,” affects individuals who have acquired brain injury from a sudden blow to the head or by an object that violently pierced the skull and entered the brain.

Local three-time Emmy Award-winning filmmaker David Brown hopes to shed some light on this complex injury by hosting a fundraising event on Sunday, Feb. 15, at the Osher Marin Jewish Community Center. Brown says that he hopes to raise enough money to help complete his documentary, Going the Distance: Journeys of Recovery.

The doc follows the lives of four TBI survivors, who reveal their personal stories of “devastation, heroism and hope.” These four individuals take the audience on a journey that chronicles each invidiaul’s road to recovery–starting from the day of their accidents to their days of learning how to walk, talk and live again.

Joining Brown is acclaimed comedian, Michael Pritchard, who will be emceeing the event with two TBI survivors: Grace Dammann and September Williams.

“This extraordinary and inspiring documentary,” Pritchard says, “[it] needs to be completed and widely distributed.”

The nearly-completed doc has screened at seven TBI conventions throughout the U.S. Brown hopes to raise $30,000 to finish his film, which he has been working on for six years. All proceeds will help pay for the costs of “music and archival licensing, color correction, sound mixing and mastering.”

Brown asks for a $25 minimum donation at the screening. The fundraising screening will take place Sunday, Feb. 15, from 4:30-6:30pm at the Osher Marin Jewish Community Center’s Kurland Lounge. To RSVP, contact David Brown at 415/468-7469. And for more information on the documentary, visit its official website, www.goingthedistance.info/index.html.

by Richard Gould

One of the very few pieces of music from ancient Greece to come down to us was penned by Euripides himself (the fragment can be found on YouTube), and heard in its unembellished simplicity it raises goosebumps–the sound is not of this world. Greek tragedy’s elusiveness and mystery-cult origins have always sat poorly with filmmakers who, looking back to the classics for character-driven engines of action and climax, find in Attic drama long passages of ritual swaying, trance-talk and that pesky chorus, with more than a trace of Eleusinian drug pumping through its veins. Michael Cacoyannis’ 1971 THE TROJAN WOMEN is a startling exception, a film that rings faithful to that long-ago religious feeling and shoots the viewer 2500 years back to Euripides’ world of magic and omnipresent threat. Cacoyannis pulled it off using four giants of cinema who were each capable of stealing the production out from under him–Katharine Hepburn, Vanessa Redgrave, Genevieve Bujold and Irene Papas–is its own miracle. Hepburn stars as Hecuba, wife of Priam and mother to the fallen Hector, who mourns with other widows below the walls of defeated Troy as the brutal and triumphant Greeks show up to ship them back into slavery and concubinage. Caged and under guard in sight of the women is the hated and defiant Helen (Papas), waiting her own fate at the arrival of jilted ex, Menelaus. The performances are a wonder to see. Available on DVD or, at this writing, in full on YouTube.

by Annie Spiegelman, the Dirt Diva

The long winter snooze-fest is over. It’s time for your plants to get back to work! Temperatures are rising (a bit soon!) and waking up the soil microbes who’ve been slacking off underground all winter. These brilliant armies of soil microorganisms are responsible for mobilizing the nutrients and moisture that keep plants growing. As UC Berkeley soil scientist, Stephen Andrews says, “When the weather warms up in the early spring, it’s like someone turned on a disco light. Those microbes wake up and start partying!” This is also the time for the gardener to get oops-up-off the couch (and electronic devices) and begin preparing the yard for spring. Here are a few key duties to attend to now.

1. Spray, only if necessary.

If you have fruit trees that get cranky and develop disease or pest problems later in the season, this is the time to spray any deciduous fruit trees with a dormant spray before the leaves and buds form. You can pick up a safe fungicide or horticultural spray at one of our fabulous local nurseries such as Sloat Garden Center or Green Jeans Garden Supply. Ask for the safest product and always wear gloves and safety glasses no matter how benign the product label looks. If your fruit trees do not get infested with insects or diseases like leaf curl, then do not spray. Just pat them on the back and say thank you.

2. Prune.

Pruning stimulates the growth of new shoots and helps to keep plants healthy. For novice gardeners, pruning can be a nerve-racking and insecure time, filled with trepidation and angst. And guilt. That’s OK. Plants are much more resilient than they let on. They like you to think they’re delicate and need constant hand-holding, but for the most part, that’s untrue. They’re faking it.

If you were too hungover on New Year’s Day to prune your roses, as I do, drunk or not, get to pruning immediately. I like to air out the center of the rosebush, take out any dead canes or crossing canes, and then cut each cane down to half its size. (I promise it will come back happy!) Be brave, pilgrim, and get to it ASAP.

If the weather stays this warm, later this month, you can also prune other shrubs such as various salvias, fuchsia, artemisia, butterfly bush and lavender. Be brave again, cutting them down to 1-2 feet tall. This will keep them from becoming leggy or hollowed out in the center.

3. Divide Perennials. (Yay! Free plants!)

The majority of perennials will need to be divided every 2-3 years to stay healthy. As a plant expands, the middle portion becomes crowded and hungry for nutrients, moisture and light. Another reason to divide plants is that they may be growing too wide for the area you planted them in. This happened to me often as a novice gardener. I had little faith that the plant would succeed and grow rapidly. (My husband, Bill, claims that it’s because I grew up in a New York apartment building where people lived on top of each other; smothering one another with loud opinions and no escape hatch or breathing space. “That is why you unconsciously plant flowers in an overcrowded, abrasive and asphyxiating style …”) See, how blissful marriage can be!

Steps to division:

Choose an overcast day. Do NOT divide plants on a hot, sunny day. That will lead to wilting and death. Not a good look.

First, prepare the hole or a few holes where the newly divided plants will land.

There may be new growth on the plant. Leave it there. Do not cut it down.

Though there are some exceptions, most plants do best when the entire plant is dug out of the ground. Dig your shovel vertically underground 6 inches to a foot deep. Dig wide and deep with your shovel, and dig out the whole clump. Take your time and be ready for some underground resistance.

With your hands or with the sharp edge of the shovel, pull or cut apart the tight roots of the clump into sections. Aim to create 2-4 new plants from the original plant.

A few good plants to divide later this month are: Shasta daisy, Phlox, Heuchera, Chrysanthemum, gaillardia, Geranium, Lily-of-the-Valley and some sages.

4. COMPOST TO THE RESCUE

Clean out raised beds of weeds or dead plants and rake them gently. Then add a 2-3 layer of compost to the top so you can plant new crops next month. This will also allow any new weed seeds to pop-up this month so that you can yank them out easily, one more time, before you plant your spring garden.

Some of my favorite places to purchase mighty compost to make your garden sing are: Point Reyes Compost Co. in Point Reyes Station, American Soil & Stone products in San Rafael and WM Earthcare’s mix at Novato’s Redwood Landfill.

Send Annie some Valentine’s Day flowers at th*********@*******nk.net.

by Amy Alkon

Q: I’m a woman in my early 20s. I do fine getting dates, but only first dates. And no, I’m not having sex with guys on the first date, but I still never hear from them again. I ran into one of these guys at a party and begged him to tell me what had gone wrong. He said, “You’re kind of intense.” I asked him to explain, and he said, “You do a lot of talking.” I do talk a lot, but I’m informed and opinionated. Do I really have to be some mute little woman to get second dates?—Man Repellant

A: On a date, you should merely be splashing your personality around, tempted as you may be to hold a guy down and try to drown him in it.

This isn’t to say you have to be “some mute little woman” to get a second date. Consider that there’s a middle ground between channeling Nancy Grace and playing a shy geisha hiding behind her fan. And sorry, but being “informed” and “opinionated” does not give you a pass to turn a date into a re-education camp with wine and entrees. In fact, this sort of conversational takeover is like a toupee; it usually ends up calling attention to whatever it was supposed to cover up (self-worth issues, nervousness, or maybe a need to push people away, despite putting yourself out there like you want a relationship).

To see more of these guys than their exhaust as they drive away forever, be mindful of the purpose of a date: getting to know somebody, not getting to know how they look listening to you. As for all this information you’re excited to impart, ironically, the way you get somebody interested in listening to you is by showing interest in them. You do that by listening to them—really listening (from the gut, not just nodding while waiting for them to take a breath so you can shoehorn in your next point).

Being willing to share the conversational space isn’t a sign you’re some empty dress of a woman; quite the contrary. It’s what secure people do—connecting with others instead of pepper-spraying them with words. Try an experiment on your next few dates. Say as little as possible about yourself all evening. Answer questions about yourself when asked, but focus on asking your date about who he is and what he thinks. Chances are, you’ll have a much better time and maybe get asked on some second and third dates. Wonderful things can happen when you give a man the sense that there’s a real reason for him to be there—as opposed to the idea that he could have stayed home and, in his place, sent a giant ear.

Q: Four or five months ago, I had an amazing dinner date with this guy. I ended up sleeping with him afterward, and he disappeared. Out of the blue, he contacted me, wanting to take me to dinner. How do I know he won’t pull the same jerko Houdini move?—Suspicious

A: When you’re on a first date and you’d like there to be a second date, it’s OK to leave a little lipstick on the rim of the glass. Your face should not end up smeared across the guy’s pillow.

Sure, there are couples who had sex on (or even before) the first date and have spent the next 67.3 years living happily ever after. But if you’re a woman wanting a relationship, be mindful that sex on the first date is a risky strategy. As researcher Anne Campbell dryly put it, “Women’s mate value is perceived to be low if they are willing to agree to low-cost sex” (as in, casual sex). A man will probably take it if he can get it—but he’s likely to, as they say, “sex it and exit.”

As for this guy, he’s already shown you that he IS someone who pulls “jerko Houdini” moves, with not so much as a texted “thx 4 putting out!!” the last time. If despite that, you agree to see him again, what prevents him from disappearing after sex is your ending the evening with your clothes on instead of on his bedroom rug. Unfortunately, the heat of the moment tends not to be home to Spock-like rationality and reserve. To guide how soon you’ll get naked, go into a date with your ultimate goal in mind—whether you have what anthropologists call a “long-term mating strategy” or whether you aren’t so much looking for Mr. Right as you are Mr. Right Next To You At The Bar.

by Katie Rice Jones

Everyone knows that Valentine’s Day is a manufactured event but, hey, your love isn’t.  Balance the commercial-ness of this saccharin day with a genuine gift from the heart. To do this, you must avoid giving V-day’s traditional tokens of love (i.e. a dozen long-stem red roses) and instead spread the love with gifts that are as unique as your love.