.Real Astronomy

July 18-24, 2018

 

ARIES (March 21–April 19)  “Take a lover who looks at you like maybe you are magic.” Whenever that quote appears on the internet, it’s falsely attributed to painter Frida Kahlo. In fact, it was originally composed by poet Marty McConnell. In any case, I’ll recommend that you heed it in the coming weeks. You really do need to focus on associating with allies who see the mysterious and lyrical best in you. I will also suggest that you get inspired by a line that Frida Kahlo actually wrote: “Take a lover who looks at you like maybe you are a bourbon biscuit.” (If you don’t know what a bourbon biscuit is, I’ll tell you: chocolate buttercream stuffed between two thin rectangular chocolate biscuits.)

TAURUS (April 20–May 20)  Here’s what author Franz Kafka wrote in his diary on Aug. 2, 1914: “Germany has declared war on Russia. I went swimming in the afternoon.” We could possibly interpret his nonchalance about world events to be a sign of callous self-absorption. But I recommend that you cultivate a similar attitude in the coming weeks. In accordance with astrological omens, you have the right and the need to shelter yourself from the vulgar insanity of politics and the pathological mediocrity of mainstream culture. So feel free to spend extra time focusing on your own well-being. (P.S.: Kafka’s biographer says swimming served this role for him. It enabled him to access deep unconscious reserves of pleasurable power that renewed his spirit.)

GEMINI (May 21–June 20)  Am I delusional to advise a perky, talkative Gemini like yourself to enhance your communication skills? How dare I even hint that you’re not quite perfect at a skill you were obviously born to excel at? But that’s exactly what I’m here to convey. The coming weeks will be a favorable time to take inventory of how you could more fully develop your natural ability to exchange information. You’ll be in robust alignment with cosmic rhythms if you take action to refine the way you express your own messages and receive and respond to other people’s messages.

CANCER (June 21–July 22)  Self-described skeptics sometimes say to me, “How can any intelligent person believe in astrology? You must be suffering from a brain dysfunction if you imagine that the movements of planets can reveal any useful clues about our lives.” If the “skeptic” is truly open-minded, as an authentic skeptic should be, I offer a mini-lecture to correct his misunderstandings. If he’s not (which is the usual case), I say that I don’t need to “believe” in astrology; I use astrology because it works. For instance, I have a working hypothesis that Cancerians like myself enjoy better-than-average insight and luck with money every year from late July through the month of August. It’s irrelevant whether there’s a “scientific” theory to explain why this might be. I simply undertake efforts to improve my financial situation at this time, and I’m often successful.

LEO (July 23–August 22)  Here are some of the fine gifts you’re eligible for and even likely to receive during the next four weeks: a more constructive and fluid relationship with obsession; a panoramic look at what lies below the tip of the metaphorical iceberg; a tear-jerking joyride that cracks open your sleeping sense of wonder; erasure of at least 20 percent of your self-doubt; vivid demonstrations of the excitement available from slowing down and taking your sweet time; and a surprising and useful truth delivered to your soul by your body.

VIRGO (August 23–September 22)  During the last three months of 2018, I suspect you will dismantle or outgrow a foundation. Why? So as to prepare the way for building or finding a new foundation in 2019. From next January onward, I predict you will re-imagine the meaning of home. You’ll grow fresh roots and come to novel conclusions about the influences that enable you to feel secure and stable. The reason I’m revealing these clues ahead of time is because now is a good time to get a foreshadowing of how to proceed. You can glean insights on where to begin your work.

LIBRA (September 23–October 22)  A reader asked Libran blogger Ana-Sofia Cardelle, “How does one become more sensual?” I’ll ask you to meditate on the same question. Why? Because it’s a good time to enrich and deepen your sensuality. For inspiration, here are some ideas that blend my words with Cardelle’s: “Laugh easily and freely. Tune in to the rhythm of your holy animal body as you walk. Sing songs that remind you why you’re here on earth. Give yourself the luxury of reading books that thrill your imagination and fill you with fresh questions. Eat food with your fingers. Allow sweet melancholy to snake through you. Listen innocently to people, being warm-hearted and slyly wild. Soak up colors with your eager eyes. Whisper grateful prayers to the sun as you exult in its gifts.”

SCORPIO (October 23–November 21)  “If people aren’t laughing at your goals, your goals are too small.” So says bodybuilder Kai Greene. I don’t know if I would personally make such a brazen declaration, but I do think it’s worth considering—especially for you right now. You’re entering into the Big Bold Vision time of your astrological cycle. It’s a phase when you’ll be wise to boost the intensity of your hopes for yourself, and get closer to knowing the ultimate form of what you want, and be daring enough to imagine the most sublime possible outcomes for your future. If you do all that with the proper chutzpah, some people may indeed laugh at your audacity. That’s OK!

SAGITTARIUS (November 22–December 21)  This mini-chapter in your epic life story is symbolically ruled by the fluttering flights of butterflies, the whirring hum of hummingbird wings, the soft cool light of fireflies, and the dawn dances of seahorses. To take maximum advantage of the blessings life will tease you with in the coming weeks, I suggest you align yourself with phenomena like those. You will tend to be alert and receptive in just the right ways if you cultivate a love of fragile marvels, subtle beauty, and amazing grace.

CAPRICORN (December 22–January 19)  I swear the astrological omens are telling me to tell you that you have license to make the following requests: 1. People from your past who say they’d like to be part of your future have to prove their earnestness by forgiving your debts to them and asking your forgiveness for their debts to you. 2. People who are pushing for you to be influenced by them must agree to be influenced by you. 3. People who want to deepen their collaborations with you must promise to deepen their commitment to wrestling with their own darkness. 4. People who say they care for you must prove their love in a small but meaningful way.

AQUARIUS (January 20–February 18)  You will never find an advertisement for Nike or Apple within the sacred vessel of this horoscope column. But you may come across plugs for soul-nourishing commodities like creative freedom, psychosexual bliss and playful generosity. Like everyone else, I’m a salesperson—although I believe that the wares I peddle are unambiguously good for you. In this spirit, I invite you to hone your own sales pitch. It’s an excellent time to interest people in the fine products and ideas and services that you have to offer.

PISCES (February 19–March 20)  Would you do me a favor, please? Would you do your friends and loved ones and the whole world a favor? Don’t pretend you’re less powerful and beautiful than you are. Don’t downplay or neglect the magic you have at your disposal. Don’t act as if your unique genius is nothing special. OK? Are you willing to grant us these small indulgences? Your specific talents, perspectives and gifts are indispensable right now. The rest of us need you to be bold and brazen about expressing them.

 

 

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