.Horoscope: What’s Your Sign?

by Leona Moon

ARIES (March 21 – April 19) All work and no play made Aries a rich fire sign! Get ready to cash in big on April 23. Prep and prime yourself for an unexpected meet-and-greet with that elusive CFO who also frequents Trader Joe’s in the morning. There’s no time like the present, so you better present your best self forward.

TAURUS (April 20 – May 20) Take a risk, Taurus! Did you ever want to join the circus? Now’s the time! You’re in for a career change on April 25 and it never felt so good to listen to your inner bull. Don’t wait around for changes to happen in the workplace—take charge like you were born to do! A clown nose never looked so good!

GEMINI (May 21 – June 20) Feel like you’re going backwards, Gemini? You’re just figuring out the past. Pluto is going retrograde in your house of relationships, and all of those nerve-racking and emotionally exhausting pit stops just seem to be hitting home a little harder. Try using “I” statements, and keep those fighting words to a minimum with a significant other.

CANCER (June 21 – July 22) Isn’t romance sweet, Cancer? Someone ordered an airplane and spelled your name in the sky! It’s fair to say that you’ve certainly won over whomever you’ve been courting. No need to pull out the big stops to impress anymore. A day old T-shirt and your charming personality will do the trick!

LEO (July 23 – Aug. 22) Lady luck is on your side, Leo! You seem to have friends in all the right places. Trying to hit the town on a weekend night? You’ve got an in with all of the bouncers. Trying to make romantic reservations for your beloved? You know all of the hostesses in town. Keep up the small talk—it pays to be a Chatty Cathy.

VIRGO (Aug. 23 – Sept. 22) You’re about to meet your match, Virgo! Did someone upgrade you to VIP? Don’t hesitate to mingle with the elite on April 26—each and every conversation you have might help you upgrade from that cubicle in the basement to an office next to the CEO!

LIBRA (Sept. 23 – Oct. 22) Settle down, Libra! No, really, settle down and pick a partner. Your house of committed partnerships is ready to settle down and let go of its partying ways. Who needs jello shots and to dance on bar tops when you have a partner who will fold your socks and change the oil in your car for you?

SCORPIO (Oct. 23 – Nov. 21) Just put a ring on it already, Scorpio! Finding the yin to your yang is no easy feat, but when your partner is as picture-perfect as what you’re working with, it’s time to just admit defeat. Drop down to one knee and call it a day. There’s no hope for you: Next year you’ll be filing joint taxes.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22 – Dec. 21) Can you believe that your co-worker said that about you, Sagittarius? Pipe down before you test out your own set of pipes. There’s no need for a screaming match on April 30—miscommunication is afoot in the stars and will tackle your patience. Do your best to check your sources before you throw accusatory flames.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22 – Jan. 19) Did you pay a recent visit to the Container Store, Capricorn? According to your pencil holder’s pencil holder, you’ve been getting down, dirty and organized. A little hard work cleaning does the soul good—there’s nothing like knowing exactly where your Spice Girls pencil from third grade is located at any given time. Get swept up in organizing on April 26.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20 – Feb. 18) Think long-term, Aquarius! The quickly approaching full moon in Scorpio on May 3 has you thinking love, career and, yes, heaven forbid—the long-term! Buckle down on April 30 and draft up a list of adjustments you’d hope to manifest with the coming full moon.

PISCES (Feb. 19 – March 20) Spring fling is here, Pisces! Hit the town full-throttle on April 24—we’re talking a new outfit and a new beau! Love is in the air, and it’s time to ask yourself the deeper questions. Is your latest match on Tinder going to bring you eternal happiness?

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