by Leona Moon
Aries (March 21 – April 19) Here come Thing 1 and Thing 2, Aries. Yep, you’re ex-significant others. Mercury went retrograde and your old girlfriends and/or boyfriends started to show up in your newsfeed. We all know that you’ve been more than a little curious to check in. Take time to say hello and explore a little rekindling action on June 1.
Taurus (April 20 – May 20) Get back on the horse, Taurus! Your self-esteem has been a little shaky lately. We’d be embarrassed, too, if our significant other ditched us to play video games. Stand up for yourself and say your piece. Your confidence is one of your best attributes, after all. And besides, who plays Pokemon anymore anyway?
Gemini (May 21 – June 20) Trouble in paradise, Gemini? Saturn went retrograde in your house of relationships—what does that mean exactly? You’re saying all the wrong things at the wrong times. If you feel like you’re tiptoeing on eggshells, it’s probably because you are, and maybe also because you haven’t taken the trash out in a few weeks.
Cancer (June 21 – July 22) A little resentful, Cancer? You’ve been hanging onto a grudge. It’s written all over your face. The only way to make things right might be to consider all the things you’ve done wrong. No one said Memory Lane wasn’t painful—a little introspection can feel like a fresh stab wound. Draft a list of people to make amends to on May 30.
Leo (July 23 – Aug. 22) Did you accidently sext your boss, Leo? Technology isn’t your thing this week. With Mercury in retrograde you’re likely to have a few technical hiccups. Do your best to keep all of your emails, texts and phone calls PG on May 31. Or you may be called into your boss’ office for an unexpected meeting.
Virgo (Aug. 23 – Sept. 22) Get real, Virgo! Hoping to tie the knot with a special someone? Here’s a spoiler alert: With Mars and Neptune butting heads, it’s very unlikely that you and yours are on the same page. So what’s the best way to realign? Take some space and wait for this celestial mess to die down—otherwise you might find yourself back on Match.com sooner than you were hoping for.
Libra (Sept. 23 – Oct. 22) Did you really just say that, Libra? What have we told you about thinking before you speak? It’s likely that you said something so painfully awkward, even the waitress at dinner slowly backed away from you. If you have something on your mind, that’s fine. But a little tact goes a long way on June 2.
Scorpio (Oct. 23 – Nov. 21) Feeling a little suspicious of a special someone, Scorpio? Your possessiveness can get the best of you, sure, but this time you might be right. Mercury in retrograde tends to bring exes back into the picture, so if your dearly beloved is hiding his or her phone, he or she might be finding a new reason to go to the laundromat at 8pm.
Sagittarius (Nov. 22 – Dec. 21) What are you looking for, Sagittarius? A new moon in your sign on June 2 has you asking yourself the big questions. Yes, bigger than, “Should I go on a juice diet this week?” We’re talking life-changing thoughts here: Career, love and health. If you’ve been uncertain about a big decision lately, here’s a clue: Go with “yes.”
Capricorn (Dec. 22 – Jan. 19) Did you just become Facebook official, Capricorn? Venus is in Cancer, your house of committed relationships, so it’s no surprise that you’ve found a special someone. Enjoy the tender long walks on the beach while they last—before the snoring starts to annoy you at least.
Aquarius (Jan. 20 – Feb. 18) Who’s that knocking at your door, Aquarius? Your ex. How did he or she find your address? It’s 2015. Pull it together—a fifth grader could find your social security number if he or she wanted to at this point. Don’t write this star-crossed lover off just yet—it might be worth it to hear what he or she has to say.
Pisces (Feb. 19 – March 20) Don’t get pregnant, Pisces! You might be eager to take things to the next level, but creating another earthling isn’t necessarily a step in the right direction. There’s some friction in your relationship right now, and babies aren’t the answer.
